i already hear my dad disowning me
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
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