are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Randomize
