you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
What did we do last night that was yellow?
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
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