like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
