I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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