Betty ford says i'm here all night
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
