dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Randomize
