it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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