my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
