Soap is not a condiment
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
