I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
