For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
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Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
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You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Pants are for mortals
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