Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize
