Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
When are your genitals available?
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Randomize
