I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
she smelled like a LAN party
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize