I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Randomize
