dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
