Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
