I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
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Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
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Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
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