He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Randomize
