found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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