I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
