My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
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The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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