remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Randomize