How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
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