Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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