my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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