He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Randomize
