i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
it's great music for shaving your balls
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize