Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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