Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize
