i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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