Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Randomize
