Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Randomize
