Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
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