Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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