when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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