Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
