fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
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