He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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