What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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