She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
His nipple licking is glorious
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