Have you finally orgasmed yet?
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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