Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize