So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
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