i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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