hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Randomize
