I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
