how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
