wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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