the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
